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Thursday, November 5, 2015

Anniversary Post (and btw, sorry my two oldest children’s pics have disappeared from this blog but I can’t remember how to fix it)

I have decided to quit blogging.  I just don’t have time for it.  Besides, I have always been an emotional writer...I only want to do it when my emotions are extreme.  When I am angry, overwhelmed, excited, one wants to hear all that mess and I sure don’t want to have to go back and re-read it. ;-)

I think this will be my last post.

On this anniversary of my wedding day, I am going to dedicate this post to my husband and our marriage.  It’s a good way to end a blog.

I am married to an amazing man.  He is rock steady.  I have, over the past 28 years, simultaneously fought against that steadiness AND craved/needed it.  I am NOT rock steady.  I am pretty flighty.  I change my mind frequently.  I like to try new stuff.  I get bored easily. I am wildly inconsistent in almost everything.  I get irritated easily when people don’t let me be wildly inconsistent (and love me for it).  Seriously?

We are a pretty perfect example of the “opposites attract” theory.  He is an introvert, I am an extrovert.  I will gladly forego the “chores” for fun, or reading, or camping..., he firmly believes in getting the chores done first and THEN having fun.  He is a techie, I am SO NOT.  He hates to argue, I love to argue (that one has been a biggie for 28 years).  I am a spender, he is happy with a $2 coffee once a week, and maybe a new gun once in awhile.  He is a hunter/fisherman, I prefer my “nature” surrounded by boisterous friends/family and all the comforts of home (i.e., glamping).  I love country music, he does not love country music (but tolerates it for me).  For the first 7 years of our marriage he didn’t want kids and I did.  For the last 7 years of our marriage I can’t get him to STOP having kids.  He can dance, I can’t.  You get the picture, right?

I have always thought I was pretty easy to live with.  I mean, I really like me. Now that I write it down though, I realize that especially an introverted, steady, logical, Type A personality may find me a little maddening.   Fortunately, he hates to argue so he rarely shows it if he does find it maddening to live with me.

The truth is, we have made a really good life together.  We are not "soul mates".  I don’t believe humans can be that to each other.  My soul mate is God, He created that spot to only be filled by Him.  I have only gotten us into trouble during these 28 years when I have forgotten that, and believed that it was a spot my husband could and should fill. We ARE partners, friends, lovers.  The dynamic of those roles has changed dramatically and frequently over the years...because I am wildly inconsistent. ;-)  He would love it if he could predict and maintain a status quo in any or all of those roles, but it’s just not going to happen.  Reality.  

I WILL TRY not to argue so much.  Why, just this morning when he told me to get a good look at our huge out-of-control forsythia bush because he was giving it a serious trimming and I wouldn’t recognize it...I told him I would not argue (as I have the past 3 years). It’s our anniversary after gift to him today. ;-)

Happy Anniversary!

Another example of our opposites:

DW’s current favorite artist/song

I can’t pick a favorite, but I really relate to this one at the moment ;-)